Down here in the South we have what local folks like to call Palmetto Bugs. They say it so sweetly with their charming accents... You think, Oh, a Palmetto Bug! How lovely! Can I get one for my home? Is it pretty like a palmetto tree? I hope I see one soon! Oh but you have been fooled...(I know, the accent gets me too).
So, what are they in reality, Palmetto bugs? They are not charming or lovely. They are not pretty. A Palmetto Bug is a REALLY big roach. And I mean really big. They are impervious to flip flops and magazines and don't bother trying to kill them with a regular fly swatter. They will just snatch the fly swatter and hit you back (and those things really sting!) You need to go put on your lace-up stompin' shoes and come back with a 2x4 (but watch out when you come back because by this time he has probably pulled his knife and is waiting behind the door). Now, I have an agreement with the roach-err, palmetto bugs. As long as they stay outside, we're cool. But once they come inside, all bets are off. (And for all you bug-lovin' hippies, all bets are off means I'm fair game as well so it's survival of the fittest.) These palmetto bugs are true masters of surprise sometimes appearing out of thin air to scuttle boldly across your bare foot, killing you with pure, unadulterated shock. They are merciless.
But honestly, other than the foot thing, they don't really bother me (I'm a spider girl all the way). They do however bother Alana. And my friend, Heather. And my friend, Jennifer. In fact, they really bother a lot of people (which is why I'm guessing they came up with the pretty name in the first place...) So, to make the southern roaches seem a little more lovable, I have designed a new line of stuff featuring Pal, the Palmetto bug. Get it?
*loud groan*
What? Look at that charming guy. All he needs is a beer and a bag of chips and he could be your best friend. And I hope you are all coming to the Rock & Shop this Saturday (this Saturday?!) to see your new best friend, Pal in um, person. He'll be up at the bar waiting for y'all (he's a bit of a lush).
i loff him. and i loff you. you make me smile and laugh.
xoxo
Posted by: BeachBms | June 27, 2008 at 07:56 AM
*Shudder* Can't even look at your cute version, that's how scarred I am after 10 years in NYC.
Getting excited for the show!!! You're going to shine.
Posted by: Alana | June 27, 2008 at 10:11 AM
Hahaha! Thanks for the props and letting all know my fears! I have to find that blog you sent me a long time ago. Remember that?!!! Good Luck this weekend! xoxoxoxo
Posted by: Jennifer | June 27, 2008 at 11:12 AM
Kara:) hahaha You really should write a book:-P We don't get "Palmetto" bugs here; so I have no opinon.
But that bag is freakin' cute!
Posted by: Jodi | June 27, 2008 at 03:02 PM
Get rid of those things before I arrive on Monday, please, or I'll bring my bb gun, lol. Hope you have a great time tomorrow, your stuff rocks!
Posted by: Leesa J | June 28, 2008 at 12:28 AM
He's cute! Though, pretty much anything embroidered in soft cottons is cute, no?
Posted by: Elizabeth | June 28, 2008 at 02:58 PM
Oh lordy, those things were so disgusting in Florida. Seriously freaked me out.
Posted by: Sarah | June 29, 2008 at 05:35 PM
when I was in Jacksonville a few years ago, I found one on top of my refrig in my hotel room. i swear the bugger was waiting for me and it was doing chin ups on my box of pringles. i actually went to the front desk and made them send someone to my room to remove it. i started by saying, "excuse me, i'm sorry, but i am from the north..." which made them hate me all that much more. your new and improved non-living cloth version, i could totally handle.
Posted by: lea | July 03, 2008 at 10:56 PM
I live in an old house in Texas and boy do we get a LOT of those here.... EEEEEEEEEWWWWWWW! *tries not to cry* *sniffle*
Posted by: April S. | September 09, 2009 at 04:44 PM